The idea of finding meaning or finding the purpose for your being is a valiant challenge for anyone. Waiting and looking for what you were put on this earth to do is something many of us do or have done. Some people will spend their whole lives looking yet never finding it.
The whole idea of finding meaning implies we must search out the things that will make our lives meaningful and I believe that for many of us, finding meaning is far too elusive.
When horrible things happen, we often search for a way to make sense of them so we look for their meaning when truly there often is none. This can get very discouraging.
What if we re-framed the wording and the thinking just a little bit? Rather than “finding” meaning we begin to “forge” meaning?
In forging meaning you are taking the bull by the horns and making decisions that will lead you in the direction you choose to go. You’ll have to make some decisions and do some hard work but by knowing that you are working towards creating something meaningful in your life is more than worth it.
I will admit that for many years I was unable to “find” and meaning in my life. It seemed as though my life was nothing but a parade of shitty situations. Yes, I was a mother and strove to do a good job but that did not seem to fill the void in my life. Being a good wife, housekeeper, family member and friend were other wonderful pieces of the puzzle of my life but I still didn’t feel as though I had “found” my meaning.
Not long before beginning this blog, I decided that my meaning wasn’t finding me nor was I finding it so I was going to forget about that and make my life important in my own way. To heck with what was “meant” for me.
I started to look at what I was good at and what I enjoyed. Writing topped my list. Public speaking was a close second. I have also been told that I am able to explain things in such a way that makes people really understand it where the meaning escaped them before. My psychiatrist was always saying how he learned a lot by speaking to me because I could articulate what many could not. With these three likes/talents/skills, I decided to begin a PTSD support group, begin a blog and one day hopefully either teach mental health professionals what it is like from the inside looking out and/or teach other people like myself what I have learned on my journey towards healing. Sharing what I’ve been taught is very important to me. It is my way of paying it forward.
In the end, my meaning did not find me. I went after it and forged my meaning for myself.
What are you good at? What do you love to do? What is your gift? That “thing” you have that others don’t seem to?
Put those things down on paper and take a good look. We ALL have gifts and we all have talents. Yours don’t need to be the same as mine or anyone else. It’s actually great that they will likely be very different. Take that list and begin to look at what sorts of things you can do with them.
Maybe the meaning you forge will to be the best mom on the planet. A great teacher. A caring nurse. A giving friend to many. There are thousands of choices and possible paths to take.
It’s time to get out there and
find FORGE your meaning.